Mammy Complex

I used to wonder why my fairer sisters and brothers are so free with their personal information. Epiphany... Mammy Complex. We've all seen the movies with blue black folks saying, "Chile, tell mammy what's on your mind. You'll feel better." Seeing this, you grow up believing all black people are hear to solve their ails. They grow thinking a psychology degree is in our DNA. I mean, I'm pretty wise, I have a college degree (yeah that means alot) and I love to help people. But here to solve your every woe, we're not. I still love you though.

My only problem is people who bask in their woes. People who only want to have you commiserate with them while taking there bs onto yourself, leaving you walking away heavy. I am not here to be your baggage carrier. You ever hear people dump on you and as they walk away, what do they say? "That's a weight off, and you're standing there with all this baggage that you didn't ask for. Now I started off talking about my fairer kin, but everyone does it. My fair kin, just goes into more graphic detail.

I would say to everyone, think about what you're going to share. If you need help, don't just dump a pile of negativity on someone. Go in it with the hope and expectation of a better tomorrow. Go in thinking, I'm going to get better after this, I just need to talk it out. I'll talk with you. But if you get to talking nonsense being crazy negative, like this will never get better. I'm going to die like this. I'm so depressed/oppressed/down. I need drugs. That's when I think, die then.

Am I unsympathetic. No, what I am is a realist and I believe in self preservation. If you take on everyone elses problems, problem's they can't or won't solve. Problems they don't want solved because they are having too much fun with the pity party, where is your energy for you? How do you combat your own drama when you are bogged down with their? The answer is you can't. We as human beings can help one another, but we can't change a life that doesn't want to be changed.

So I say, let go of the mammy complex in 2011 and forever. Don't be any one's garbage collector. When they try to dump there garbage on you, shut them down and think to yourself, "Wow that weights gone."